Cari-bein'

The Attack of the Novelty Gag Gift

I woke myself from a nightmare a short while ago. Not intentionally, as in "I'm having a nightmare, I must wake up!" No, I woke myself because I was literally batting my arms through the air trying to fend off that which was trying to attack me in my dream. What was it? A rubber chicken. Seriously. (It was much scarier than it sounds.) It was flying at me after it had come loose from a pale-colored adobe house. It's a wonder I didn't wake the boyfriend because when I 'came to' I was flailing my arms in all directions.

I'm having some very strange dreams lately. Yesterday I slept right up until boyfriend's alarm went off, a rarity for me. I'd been dreaming that I was looking at an apartment. I'd pretty much made the decision to move there, but was feeling quite depressed about it because I'd lived in the same apartment years before. I had this awful sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that having to live there again was a huge step backward. The only upside was that Bette Midler was now the resident manager. It was a funky old Victorian building that had been converted to four apartments. Bette whispered that her parents had purchased it and asked her to manage the building in exchange for free rent. And this was present-day Bette. I don't know what had happened to her husband and daughter in the dream, but she seemed quite happy to be an apartment manager. The apartment seemed to be in San Francisco...and yet maybe not.

I always have strange dreams--nothing new there--but latley they've been rather extreme in their emotional intensity, even for me. As I wrote to one of my fellow journalers, I suddenly feel like I've been on emotional overload. Seems obvious now (that the light bulb over my head blinked on). She suggested we do something especially nurturing for ourselves this weekend, and it made me realize I hadn't been doing that for myself the last couple of weeks. The beach is what primarily does it for me and my only time there (as I wrote last weekend) was spent listening to my possible work replacement debate (with herself) out loud the pros and cons of returning to her old job. I didn't get that recharging, renewing, reenergizing, rejuvenating 'hit' that I crave and need to get me back to center. This weekend, I plan to set aside time for just that...and more.

posted by Marilyn @ 2:24 AM